Million dollar idea

If I know anything about kids (I don’t), I know there are three things they like:

Profanity
Gross-out humor
Sugary breakfast cereals

Armed with this knowledge, I’m going to make a fortune with my new breakfast cereal — Crispy Shit Bitz. Think poop-shaped Cocoa Puffs. Genius, I tell ya.

Doughnuts

The word “donut” came into popular usage in 1942 when we were saving “g”s and “h”s for the war effort. We’re no longer conserving “g”s and “h”s, so knock it off already. They’re doughnuts.

Speaking of Bunnies…

The other day I was perusing the Rural King website, my curiosity having gotten the better of me after a friend told me they sold baby chickens and turkeys there. Apparently they also sell “Bunny Rabbits” — with this “disclaimer”:
“Bunny Rabbits are only to be used as livestock.”

So don’t you even think of trying to make pets of them, or using them for some sort of twisted egg-delivery service.